The days of dueling are over and have been for some time. If you have a dispute with someone, you often end up in a courtroom with a lawyer. Having a good relationship with your lawyer goes a long way towards determining success.

Finding an attorney is a catch 22 proposition. There are lots of us around, but how do you tell who is competent and who is not? It is a difficult proposition to say the least. There simply is not a solid, independent rating system for lawyers people can use.

Of all the choices, getting a referral from a family member, business associate or friend is usually the most reliable way of finding a good attorney. Even then, you need to understand how to work with the person to get the best result.

Nobody likes discussing delicate matters for fear of them being revealed to others. When talking with your lawyer, you do not have to worry about this. The attorney client privilege requires that the lawyer forgo making any such disclosures.

Why does this confidentiality exist? The view of the courts is that there must be a free flow of information between attorney and client to make sure justice is done. This means discussing positive and negative items, thus the privilege.

There is, however, an important thing to remember about this privilege. You cannot make something illegal privileged by telling your attorney. If you repeat a slanderous statement to an attorney, it is not suddenly off limits in a legal case.

Now that you are comfortable talking, what do you actually tell your lawyer? Well, you tell them whatever they ask for. Yes, you will obviously tell them your side of the story. Ah, but what if you leave things out that are not favorable to you?

You should never decide what is important and what is not. You are not a lawyer. Most attorneys are far more interested in problematic facts and issues than the favorable ones. After all, those are the issues that will have to be overcome to win the case.

Attorneys expect every case to have weak points. What we really want to avoid, however, is surprising evidence. Every case has problems and we can deal with them. The unexpected surprise is where cases fall apart.

How often in your life do you have the chance to tell someone everything with no fear of disclosure? The attorney client privilege allows for that. Take advantage of it. Do not hold back. Tell the lawyer everything so your case can have the best chance of success as possible.